Crowns, Sashes & Strength
Author: Madison Ward
The words ‘worthless, ugly, never good enough’ written on slips of paper fell into an empty trashcan. Would anyone believe that these were words elementary age girls scribbled to described themselves? Through a small activity, one dynamic woman has changed the lives of many girls in eastern New Mexico.
Kagan Massey of Hobbs, NM, a Texas Tech student and the 2015 Miss Rodeo New Mexico, changes young girl’s (grades 6 to 12) lives through an organization she created called Proverbs and Sashes.
As Miss Rodeo New Mexico, Massey was not required to have a platform, but felt a calling to start a mentoring program. She put her title and crown to good use knowing that would allow her expanded her exposure and credibility.
“I felt there was no better way to connect with younger girls than have a crown on top of my head,” Massey said. “This was an opportunity to start Proverbs and Sashes.”
Katelynn Brownlee of Plainview, TX, Massey’s friend described Massey as having a heart of gold not only as a friend to her, but for all of the young girls’ lives she has had a positive influence in.
“Proverbs and Sashes is about social pressure that any young girl will go through and it’s truly remarkable how she helps those girls,” Brownlee said.
Massey’s inspiration to instill confidence in young girls came from her own life struggle as a bullied teen in high school. She said she was verbally attacked by a group of girls and felt compelled to change schools.
“I’m not a crier. I am a very happy person and I was crying myself to sleep every night. I was miserable,”Massey said. “I was sick of having to put on a front that everything was great when deep down I was hurting.”
She said that if she would have had an organization like Proverbs and Sashes, she would have been grateful for someone to encourage her and help her through the situation.
“I would have loved to have had an organization to be apart of like Proverbs and Sashes, where I would have had older women pouring their love and their wisdom into me and that might have been able to help me in the situation and not had to change schools.”
However, because of her own personal experience, she is able to have great insight and understanding with young ladies dealing with similar issues.
StopBullying.gov revealed on a national level that most bullying takes place in schools and 28 percent of students have experienced being bullied in grades 6 to 12. A study showed that about 49 percent of students between the grades of 4 to 12 reported being a victim of bullying in each month.
Massey said that being bullied is something that is casually looked over, but is a rising epidemic in America. As a result, she said she believed that suicide rates are growing at an alarming degree.
Massey realized she wanted to start an organization when she was at Texas Tech. After hearing about a program in her hometown, My Power, she decided to join.
She volunteered as a leader with My Power, but knew she wanted to broaden her reach to girls beyond the school district, as My Power was only for 5th graders.
“One thing led to another,” she said, “shortly after I was crowned as Miss Rodeo New Mexico, I thought what a better time to start this. Everything just fell into place.”
At each event food, door prizes and games are provided. The younger aged girls receive a sash to decorate.
After the girls have had a chance to get comfortable with each other, guest speakers provide insight on self-esteem, peer pressure and God’s love.
“It is just a quick hour and a half,” she said. “It goes by really quick, it is fun and short enough for them to stay focused.”
Massey said that the most memorable moment is when the girls write on a piece of paper their insecurity, worry or fear and throw it in the trash.
This seems to help them physically and mentally get rid of the issues and the positive reaction is visible as they throw away those negative thoughts.
“Being a girl that struggled with bullying and knowing how it feels to constantly have that struggle and pull on your heart. It is fun to watch these girls be able to change, almost like how a butterfly changes,” Massey said.
Seeing the difference is why she continues to host Proverbs and Sashes. The girls come in insecure and walk out with new strength and confidence.
“Hopefully, they maintain confidence throughout the week and other teachers, kids and their peers see a difference in themselves.”
Massey credits a lot of her success with Proverbs and Sashes to her experiences and skills gained competing in rodeo queen pageants.
“There is so much hard work and dedication put into pageants, which has already allowed me to have strong work ethic,” she said. “Always giving 100 percent and dedication is a goal of mine.”
She was able to carry the memories of the girls and children she met throughout her year traveling as Miss Rodeo New Mexico. She would encourage the children to sign the back of her chaps. This small token to Massey turned into a huge act of importance to the child with the pen. As chaps are used as protection for cowboys and it is a comforting thought that the small individuals that signed Massey’s chaps receive protection from her words of encouragement.
Massey was amazed by one thing that she did not expect from her program, that those girls too would have such an affect on her own life.
“I do hope that Proverbs and Sashes continues to grow,” she said. “Although I do not have a crown on top of my head as Miss Rodeo New Mexico, I hope I can still have just as a big of an impact on these girl’s lives, who have also had just as big as an impact on my life.”